Those of you who check this page every morning, with bated breath, to see the progress I've made in my literary endeavours will notice that I've made some changes to the clutter on my coffee table.
I am now, no longer really reading anything. I was sorta liking The Zahir. Really. And yet, there was nothing compelling me to read the next page. Or, even, really, the next sentence. My obscenely slow progress on that book resulted in never really starting The Other Boleyn Girl. And I hit a point where I was looking at having to renew the books for a FOURTH time, having only read 10 pages since the last renewal.
So I decided to do something I have only done once before. I didn't finish a book I started. I have this rule that states I have to finish every book I start. And, with the exception of Accordion Crimes, which, thank the heavens above I lost before I could be guilted into finishing, I have. Until 3 months ago. And last week. And I've decided two books makes a pattern and that I'm allowed to break my own rules if they're no longer serving my purpose or fitting in with my life. (Even if I'm still trying to convince myself that all it shows is an evolution, a growth, a desire and a willingness to change the way I live my life when it isn't suiting me anymore, and not that it's some glaring example of how I'm no longer the person I thought I once was. Really, it's okay. :p)
So I've made some decisions:
1) I'm no longer forcing myself through things I'm not enjoying. Especially when they're supposed to be relaxing distractions. Life is too short and far too busy.
2) I will stop trying to force myself to like something and put the onus back on the artist to entertain me.
3) Non-fiction gets ONE MORE SHOT and THAT'S IT for at least 8 months. This isn't so much related to the above books but I'm so sick of starting non-fiction to educate myself and then having to sit through some narcissist's self-indulgent babbling. Instead I will read blogs! ;) (Not that I am extremely judgemental or harbour strong feelings against non-fiction or anything. :p)
So, right now, I am bookless. Except for the two books I currently have on the go. :p I will finish those! And then, free from all encumbrances, I will go out in the sunshine and feel the wind on my face and know that I am free to select any book I want. And often, that feeling of freedom is all I need to get me back on the right track.
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2 comments:
Baby steps.
I am so sad you feel so vehemently towards non-fiction! I have realized I pretty much *only* read fiction when it's assigned in a class. My "fun" books that I brought with me seem to all be on heterodox econ and the UN. (Do the writings of Khalil Gibran count as fiction?) I do not understand the fiction attraction *at all,* though I know Lizzy (for example) thinks I am a strange alien because of it. :p
But yay for you breaking out of your mold and setting a bold, new, unfettered, free, bookburning path for yourself! (I guess bookburning isn't really all that analogous to bra-burning... hmm...)
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