Things that make you feel human again

With all this moving, and upheaval, and re-settling, it's really strange to discover which things make you feel human and normal and home-ish and settled again. And I don't mean the big things, like your bed, or your clothes, or actually having a TV and phone. I mean the little things that somehow do a better job of making you feel like things are normal than those bigger, yet very important, things do.

Sun-Maid Raisins

Nature's candy. The stabilizing power of the little red box of raisins with the brown-haired, bonneted girl, is amazing. I think my mother must consider these some sort of staple, on par with water, or oxygen. These were *always* part of our lunch. Starting from pre-school and kindergarten days. As we changed from lunchboxes in primary grades, to brown lunchbags when lunchboxes were no longer cool, back to insulated lunchbags when we were in university or working, and were carrying enough food for days, or, most recently, in the snack bags she packed for interview trips, these little red boxes were always stashed everywhere. So somehow it seemed appropriate, when we were buying snacks for me to move up here with, while I was staying somewhere shortterm, that she threw in a bag of SunMaid raisin boxes. And last week I was sitting at my desk, eating SunMaid raisins and remembering how I used to sit at my desk, over 20 years ago, in kindgergarten and Grade 1, eating SunMaid raisins and I had to smile. My fingers have probably doubled in size (at least) and yet they're still trying to pry out the raisins, all packed so tightly together you wonder if you'll pass out from hunger before you get to one. There's something very comforting about that red box. It's like it's a reminder that, no matter how much things seem to have changed, you're actually still in the same world. And you're still the same you.

Oven Mitts

I was kinda living off EasyMac (not even regular mac and cheese because that would require, like, pots) for a bit at first, but when you make EasyMac the bowl gets REALLY hot. Like REALLY hot. So when I went for the first "stock-up" grocery shopping trip, I made sure to get oven mitts because the absence of oven mitts was weighing heavily on my mind. I hung them on my cupboard handles and it amazed me how calming that was. To see oven mitts and pot holders hanging on the cupboard handles. Like someone actually lived here. Everything was still in boxes, I had only been in the apartment for less than 48 hours, but the oven mitts were there, and out. It was a normal kitchen.

Fridge Magnets

I think I mentioned how my sister unpacked a ton of my stuff for me. It was a great feeling to walk into an unpacked apartment. But the items that stood out to me most were my fridge magnets. Almost all of them are from my travels. I know lots of people think fridge magnets are tacky, but I love my fridge magnets. Each one represents a great memory. And if the oven mitts were a sign that *someone* lived here, the magnets were a sign that *I* lived here. I had moved in. This was my home.

The Newspaper

I'm not a news junkie in a "glued to CNN/reading 14 news websites every hour" sort of thing, I'm just addicted to reading the newspaper. Even if I don't read most of it, and just skim through it, or turn the pages reading only headlines, I need a newspaper around. This week I finally subscribed to a paper and the first one arrived today. I went down to the front lobby to get it, and as soon as I picked it up, a sort of calm washed over me, like when you sit down after a long day and have that first sip of wine, or when you finally catch an episode of 90210, or when you finally buy the first postcard while on vacation, or a shower after a weekend of camping. It was like a hit of a drug. It was like everything was settled and back to normal. It was like I was human again.

Somehow these things were the biggest calming forces. With each one, I was surprised at what it did for my psyche. Sometimes it's the smallest things...